Close calls

So i had a terrible week. I'm over it.

what im not over is how many close calls I've had -

1) As I'm crossing the road and this idiot in a black racish-mazda-looking beast of a vehicle speeds incredibly fast towards me, and as i scurry away like a mjinga, alas, the guy was pulling one of those handbrake u-turns that are straight out of Transporter 2 (which i should warn u is just a cartoon on testoserone). One mistake in that highly masculine manouver, and I'd have been grilled minced meat.

2) I almost burnt my kitchen, along with the rest of my building down making fries. All in the name of a quick dinner. lets just say i'll be spending more time cleaning that friggin oven.

3) ok so theres no number three. but 2 close calls in a week is more than enough!

God are you trying to tell me something? I promise I'll listen if u just write it down and mail it to me.

This had better be a good week I'm running out of that 'stay positive' juice.